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So much for all that about not giving in

Not creating a connection  as good as sin

It’s just something he stirs within.

I don’t think I’d have turned away- or even said no

Even if you paid me to.

Temptation is a mother

Seduction is a father

What to call their child…

I wouldn’t even bother.

And to think nothing’s even changed.

The order still remains

Those two will make beautiful children

And my mind is still in chains

When the good get pushed too far

It’s usually a matter of the heart

Not just anyone or anything

Can interrupt a life in full swing

But a broken heart will stop a man running

Just as a car will stop cease its healthy humming

Pushed too far, far enough to lose heart

Far enough to grow tart

With others, blaming fathers and mothers for bringing fruits into this world.

Sour, bitter, nasty fruits

Worse than a few home truths.

                When the smile finally fades

It’s something one can never change back to old

Confident and bold

As one may be

There’s no winning the good back easily.

Alas, when the good get pushed too far

It’s a matter of a boiling heart

And antibodies help form a scar

So that next time,

They’ll have to push twice as hard.  YaSaBa

Maybe

Maybe I’ll never say sorry again

Maybe we can never be friends

Maybe’s a word we use

It’s something we say when we can’t choose

Let Me

I hate it when I can’t express myself

Whether it’s personal

Failure or because I’m censored.

How then am I supposed to inspire,

Be town crier

Elevate people to higher than

Their own personal mire

When my situation’s dire

When then should I display my skill

To give people power of will

That gives them time to still

The urge to kill

the flow of life and the ray of light which should spill so freely

Onto the opportunity borne of hard ground which I till.

So then my word

Ceases to be a sword

With which to destroy

Every clapboard

Mind that houses crap thoughts

Instead of- my Lord!-

The mansions and chalets and the yachts

I help you climb aboard

To make you feel you’ve won a lifetime achiever award.

Why then do I continue to live here,

Who then is it I’ve come to fear

What is it they have that clears

 My mind of all words I hold dear

Let them scorn, let them jeer

but never let them- people and my own emotion- create a frown

create that void or cause my eye to tear

Across a room, in each other’s room

These two could burn a house down.

There’s a searing hiss of passion

Every time their scorching lips kiss.

Steamy has little on this

Hot, sizzling bliss that they create.

With their eyes they speak of pleasures undelivered

Which they more than desire to share unhindered.

She knows where his touch is best

And how her hands caress his chest

As her strokes her curves and evokes reactions that deserve

His utmost attention

As carefree and without pretension

Their bodies merge, blend, melt into wet oneness.

Alone they’d not overcome this

So together they seek bliss.

Holding onto the moment and one another;

For everything less than satisfaction is torment. 

My Word

Need I vow?

Not to bow down to my own temptation

The time is now to never be second,

There’s no tomorrow or next time

No matter how grand or fine he may be

No ifs, no buts, no maybes

I am and always will be number one

It’s all or nothing

Spare me the sweet stuffing

Of deliciously sweet nothings

For I’ve promised myself

To this word I’m held

Scarred Hearts

When the good get pushed too far

It’s usually a matter of the heart

Not just anyone or anything

Can interrupt a life in full swing

But a broken heart will stop a man running

Just as a car will stop cease its healthy humming

Pushed too far, far enough to lose heart

Far enough to grow tart

With others, blaming fathers and mothers for bringing fruits into this world.

Sour, bitter, nasty fruits

Worse than a few home truths.

                When the smile finally fades

It’s something one can never change back to old

Confident and bold

As one may be

There’s no winning the good back easily.

Alas, when the good get pushed too far

It’s a matter of a boiling heart

And antibodies help form a scar

So that next time,

They’ll have to push twice as hard.  YaSaBa

Bad fruit, Twisted minds

Fertile minds can bear bad fruit

Good thoughts only are a fool’s thoughts solely

A lady has sex thoughts: roll me

A gentleman petty: blow me!

All to prove that we are not as well as we look on the outside.

Everybody’s just a little sick and twisted.

Proven by the glint in the eye,

Many have missed it

And the flicker of the tongue

Some have dreamt to kiss this

And that as their thoughts

Would put them

Flat on their backs.

Yet, there’s doom too

Some think gloom through

The days and nights

Clever but imagining fights, crashing flights

Oh what we think of does not reflect one’s heart, though

A wicked smile, but cardiac glow

It is those who act on these

Horrid time takers

The sadistic love makers

And maniac stalkers

Who keep girls panties

In remote lockers

They are a bit more than

A little sick or twisted

We who suppress the evil in

 Our nature and spin great

Deeds and ideas are gifted. YaSaBa 

Take Me Home

Skies are grey

And it’s threatening to rain

But my eyes will be dry tonight

Not only because I should be happy

But because I’m so damn tired.

I’m in limbo, between sleep and wakefulness

My thoughts repeat themselves with such faithfulness

I am not complete

And my demons I can’t defeat alone

Send me someone to help me

And

Send me to a place called home. YaSaBa 

I Write

My words are all about people

I have no time for birds and trees

For I cannot relate- or am not even there- when they bleed.

I know that

It’s always my aim to show that

Vulnerable side of human life

Prone to scratch and cut

Liable to get in a jam

Stuck in a rut.

I wish to understand the human mind and why we cry

For ourselves and others

Why it’s ever an option for everyone-

Fathers, sisters, mothers.

I look to see and show a strength

People like me would go to any length

Beauty is beheld by naked eye

Mine is great and

Everywhere this I spy in unexpected hiding places

For it is often hidden as

The owners wish not to let escape this

One trait that gives them sparkle

For fear not all find it remarkable.

Can I not write of these? YaSaBa

Is It Real?

It’s a song sung before my time

I’ll come up with a new line

To tell people what you do to me

To question when- if ever- I’ll be set free.

I’m not in love

And I won’t call it lust

For another song goes,

“It’s just a little crush”

And it was just a kiss

My lips here and yours like this

Us communicating in a language the entire city wouldn’t miss

In a car, in an office.

It’s all the same. Bliss

The taste, however and the feel, too

Is what made it uniquely you.

How eager, how willing

How absolutely thrilling

To be the one for that moment

To be your sun and you my comet

The flames and sparks

Lit up the dark of the place and feeling

Tell me.

Did I leave you reeling?

I could feel your heart beat

So tell me, when our lips meet

How do you feel?

I know it was fun… but just how real.

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Nothing burns like resentment

Nothing scars like the pain

Pour scalding tea on my hand

The welts do not compare.

Never test the boiling point of the heart

Because it begins to singe

And  melt of the edges

Deforming those lacy fringes.

You can pour cold water before it begins to scar…

But no, nothing compares

To the anger in my heart.

Only prayer and faith can bring one back from the brink of death

And nothing kills like the holding of one’s breath.

Being unable to speak is worse than anything

Being unable to say what I feel and think

Is to send me to the deadly brink

So watch me sink into the mire with

no sentence higher than execution

for I value nothing more than my broken

heartfelt elocution. YaSaBa 

I actually pictured us kissing

But now I’ll never know…

So it’s time to go

This land no longer holds

Anything I can’t get at home

Curiosity led me away

But I’m about to end my stay

For it’s shadows I’d chase

And you’d have only led me astray

They always say don’t waste another day

When you’ve finally found your place

Home is where the heart is

He’s got mine so I must need his

No more running

Because there are no more questions

No more doubts and hesitation

Gone is all temptation

To dream or pursue further relations.

It’s as if he knew though-

And now I’m coming back.

It’s what I do- all I can.

I go away… take time and stray

Then I reach out- and he takes my hand. YaSaBa

What I Can't God Will

MY TEMPER FLARES WHEN THE HEAT GOES UP.

IT’S LIKE A GAS STOVE.

FLICK THE RIGHT SWITCH AND I COULD BLOW.

WHEN I CAN’T PUT YOU INTO WORDS,

WHEN I FAIL,

WHEN YOU LOOK FOR THE WRONG IN ANYTHING RIGHT.

IT’S HARD BEING ME

WHEN I WISH I COULD MAKE THE WORLD REVOLVE THE WAY I WISH IT TO, SEE?

I SEE FLAWS AND I WISH I COULD FIX THEM

BUT I DON’T HAVE THE POWER,

I DON’T HAVE THE SKILL.

I CAN’T OPEN YOUR EYES…

BUT GOD WILL. YaSaBa

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DID YOU KNOW WHAT WHEN YOU’RE UNHAPPY

YOUR BODY HURTS

IF YOU LISTEN HARD ENOUGH YOU CAN HEAR IT POUNDING AGAINST YOUR SKIN IN PROTEST TO CHANGE

TO PROTECT IT FROM THE PAIN

OH, IF YOU LISTEN!

LISTEN WITH YOUR HEART

YOUR THROAT HURTS AND YOUR PALMS ITCH

YOUR PULSE ONLY QUICKENS BECAUSE

YOUR VERY BONES QUAKE

THEY KNOW WHAT THEY NEED AND THEY DON’T NEED PAIN.

YOUR NOSTRILS QUIVER BECAUSE THE VERY AIR IS TOXIC.

THE ATMOSPHERE IT ISN’T FRESH- REFRESHING SO YOUR LUNGS CONSTRICT.

THAT’S WHY YOUR ARMS CROSS OVER CHEST

TO PROTECT YOUR VERY SOUL.

IT’S THE ONLY WAY TO GET THROUGH.

CONQUER THE SORROW AND CONTINUE TO LIVE… GROW OLD.                YASABA

Just a Text

I have this yearning for a person who gets further and further away with time

Either it’s his fault

Or it’s mine

But blame aside, the distance grows

And yet, I’ve time to wonder what he really knows.

Oh my mind will bear it much longer

as the desire grows stronger

When it should start to falter

Even his silence cannot alter

The emotions under the surface

A single short message will suffice

To pump new blood to my head, heart and start a new cycle of

Dreamless nights and fancy in day

Were we to come face to face now, I wonder just what kind of game we’d play. YaSaBa